Ah, memories

My Mom kicks ass.
No, seriously, she kicks ass.
When I was a kid and my older brother was not the jackass he is now, but instead he was the very best coolest big brother any girl could ask for--when he wasn't protecting me from my sister, he was mouthy to Mom.  He was as mouthy as any teenager could be.  And to a small child such as I was, he was tall, like a giant, and I always looked up to him in more than the figurative sense.
I remember multiple times when he would give Mom shit about one thing or another and she'd grab his ear and give him hell.  It was all done in play (for the most part), in which my brother would be laughing while he yelled "Ow!!" and the spectators would be laughing at him for being stupid enough to get Mom riled.  No one messes with my Mom!  Trust me.  She broke a plastic spoon or two on his back when he needed a whoopin'.

Then there was the time I was supposed to go on a field trip in 5th grade.  We were going to go north, to a very exciting place, and I was very excited to go, because the trip was going to be SO exciting.
Now, Mom being Mom, she was running late.  I was running late.  We were running late.  We got to the school early--7:30.  That's early for a 10 year old.  Trust me.
I checked the door I was supposed to enter to meet my class before the trip.  It was locked!  Oh noes!  The school looked pretty much deserted and there was no bus waiting.  Being a brilliant 10 year old, I deduced that I'd missed the bus.  Much drama ensues with me being upset at missing the exciting field trip.  Mom decides it can't have been that long since the bus left, we'll just see if we can catch it!
Now, you see, it's rural Montana.  There's lots of long stretches of lonely highway, and back then the speed limit was 55 mph.  "Catching up" meant doing 60-65.  Off we go, heading the way we think the bus will go.  Zoooom!
We got about 15 miles out of town before Mom declares defeat--we would've seen the bus by that point and she couldn't chase it down the whole way.  She turned around and headed back toward town.  And, you guessed it, the bus passed us going the opposite way about 5 minutes after we turned around.
There goes my daredevil Mom, pulling a U-turn in the middle of the highway, in the middle of a foggy morning (did I forget to mention that?  Oh, well, it was really foggy.  visibility was crap) and takes off after the bus.  We were on a two-lane highway, and because of her desire to see her dearest daughter happy, she pulls up next to the bus.  She's keeping an eye on the road while yelling at me, "Get their attention!!  Wave them down!!"  So I'm going crazy, waving like a crazy-inflatable-flailing-arm-man, hoping someone, anyone will see me.  Please!
Someone did, they told the bus driver & teacher, and the bus pulled over so I could board.
My Mom needs a cape because she's clearly a hero.